Read about Co-Founder and 2x Surrogate Lisa’s first experience at a fertility clinic.

I was completely caught off guard the first time I walked into a fertility clinic for cycle monitoring.  My thoughts were that I would be walking into an empty, quiet waiting room where a lab tech was waiting for my arrival.  I was extremely short sighted. 

I did walk into a very quiet waiting room — eerily so.  The waiting room was completely packed.  Couples holding each other’s hands, individuals trying to look occupied by their phone or an old issue of Canadian Living Magazine. I was frozen where I stood, looking around, processing what I was seeing.  These people were here because of the struggle with infertility.  

I knew and understood that infertility was an issue.  I was a Surrogate, matched with a couple who at the time were 8 years into their journey to a child. 

So, if I knew about this, why was I stranded in a crowded waiting room so surprised? Truthfully, I didn’t fully understand how many people infertility affected.  1 in 6 couples.  That’s a sobering statistic.  Why didn’t I know?  Simply, the stigma that surrounds it. 

The reality of those all those people at the clinic with infertility, is that they were not alone.  The stigma of being labelled as infertile is not something anyone wants.  While there should be no shame in having difficulties conceiving it is still experienced because infertility has only recently become a topic discussed in the news or social media. 

The only way to reduce the stigma attached to infertility is to encourage the conversation and to support those who are facing difficulties conceiving. 

As I started writing this blog I wondered, do I have the right to have an opinion about infertility?  After all, I’m one of those women who conceived without issue.  So easily, that I carried babies for others.  No one struggling with infertility wants to hear from me and how easy I had it.  

I considered that if the stigma around infertility needs to change, then maybe those of us who don’t struggle should make the first move to be the change. We can choose to be advocates for others.  We can help to change laws for fertility treatments and financial compensation for surrogates or decide to be surrogates or egg donors.  We can do more simple things as well.  We can stop asking friends or family those dreaded questions “When are you going to start a family?” Or “Do you not want kids?” 

All in all, infertility is a topic that shouldn’t be swept under the rug, but rather, one that we should all be aware of. Let’s work on educating ourselves and our society on the prevalence and challenges that couples and individuals go through while trying to build a family. The struggles that individuals and families face regarding infertility should be part of a journey to other ways of creating life. We hope that at Fertility Match, we can create the necessary stepping stones to destigmatize infertility, and create a discussion about third party reproduction.  

Our dream at Fertlity Match is to connect couples and individuals in finding the right Surrogate or Egg Donor, and to make families a reality. Choose Fertility Match as your Fertility Consulting Agency, and we promise to make your journey to building a family a wonderful and positive experience.

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